Is your lover having a midlife crisis? It’s not just sports vehicles and trendy hairstyles that are making headlines. It’s common for people to have a “midlife crisis” between the ages of 35 and 65. At a crossroads between youth and old age, the crisis might feel like an existential moment of self-evaluation for many people. In this article, discover 6 signs that your spouse might be having a midlife crisis.
They may find themselves continuously questioning their life choices and habits. Some people have a true “crisis” during this time, and as a result, they act out of character, whether it’s a tiny adjustment to their daily routine or a major shift in their personality and values.
Midlife Crisis
When a middle-aged person (typically between 35 and 65 years old) feels driven to face and/or review their mortality, confidence, identity, and accomplishments, they are referred to as having a midlife crisis. Elliott Jaques, a psychologist, created the word in 1965.
A midlife crisis can be sparked by any life-altering event and has more to do with worry about change than it does fear of aging, despite the fact that it’s tempting to assume that this is the sole cause of a midlife crisis. There are a number of important life events, such as a divorce, a milestone birthday, a parent’s death, or a medical diagnosis, that drive us to face our own mortality and assume (sometimes inadvertently) a new identity in midlife.
Here are six telltale indicators that your partner is having a midlife crisis, and what you can do to help them.
1. Feeling the Call of the Wild and the Will to Explore
If you’re in the middle of a midlife crisis, one of the first things you’ll notice is that, having a nice time and going on adventures, both good and terrible. Having an affair, quitting your job, or buying a big-ticket item are all examples of severe steps that people may do in an attempt to find happiness. Instead of buying a fresh new sports automobile, people who choose self-reflection over reflexes like these end up happier. To have a positive impact on our lives, psychologist Vivian Diller, Ph.D., advises that “new ideas ought to be feasible, not impossible.” In order to achieve long-term success, the key is to make slow, measured improvements.
2. Showing Symptoms of Depressive Disorder
Mood swings that impair daily activities and interpersonal relationships are common in adults going through a midlife crisis. It’s possible that friends, family, and work will all be put on the backburner. If you feel that your partner is depressed, keep an eye out for the following: the feeling of melancholy, helplessness, and gloom; indifference to previously pleasurable pastimes; not having enough stamina; problems with concentration and decision-making; atypical sleeping habits; and unusual food cravings or a significant change in weight.
You should always be there to support your partner through life’s ups and downs, but you should also urge them to seek professional treatment when necessary.
3. Asserting Doubts about Preconceptions
It’s a red indicator if someone suddenly quits their job or invests in a new career path. Experimenting with new ideas and concepts can be beneficial, but a complete 180-degree turn might be disastrous. Even yet, the desire to explore and experiment isn’t necessarily a negative thing, as long as it’s done in a deliberate manner and doesn’t interrupt daily life.
It’s in situations like these that a mentor or life coach comes in handy. They can provide your spouse the objective support and assistance they need to begin a new route.
4. Emotional Outbursts
A partner having a midlife crisis may try to blame you for their changed feelings when they lash out. Everyone assumes that everything is fine because you didn’t observe or address those actions. It is common for people to blame others while they are going through an internal crisis themselves. It’s hazardous to answer with their level of vigor and hostility since they’ll be short-tempered and enraged. Make an effort to avoid turning the situation into a battle.
5. Making a Hasty Decision
Indecisiveness can manifest in two ways: it can cause both the individual experiencing paralysis and those around them to be frustrated. Even though they realize it’s time for a change, they’re unable to make it happen. Flip-flopping on major life decisions is another form of indecision. It’s likely that your partner is dissatisfied in the relationship right now, but before you seek a divorce lawyer, look into what might be driving their dissatisfaction. Their ex-husband or wife turns out to be the very reason they can get their lives back on track.
6. Abandoning Your Spouse
Because of a drive to prove their sexual prowess or simply because they are bored, adultery is a common sign of midlife crisis. Signs of a cheating spouse include a spouse’s physical and emotional withdrawal from the marriage, erratic work schedules, and a tendency to guard their cell phone more than usual. Before you accuse your partner of having an extramarital affair, don’t make any snap judgments. You can repair trust in your marriage after adultery, even if it takes some time and effort. A wonderful place to begin is with couples counseling.
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