How to Tell if a Girl Is Gay Based on How She Acts Around You

This is definitely one of the most often asked questions I receive. They’re all curious about how to tell if a girl is gay. Listen, you can’t really discern someone’s sexuality at the end of the day.

Nobody has the words “I’m homosexual” or “I’m straight” written on their brows. Many people keep their sexuality to themselves. Of course, some people give more overt indications of their sexuality, but it’s not always obvious.

I used to be a tomboy in high school and university. I wore sweatpants and always had my hair in a messy ponytail. Did that cause a lot of confusion? Naturally, it did. Many folks thought I was a lesbian or bisexual.

How to Determine Whether a Girl Is Gay

As a result, it is critical not to always rely on stereotypical qualities. Simultaneously, stereotypes can sometimes assist us in labeling someone. There are various qualities you can use to determine whether a lady is gay or not (but you’ll never really know unless she tells you or you ask).

This is what I’d call “gaydar.” Here are some methods to tell if a girl is gay, whether you’re a man or a woman.

Let’s sort it out together.

1. Ask her politely. I’ve highlighted the term ‘nicely.’ You can’t just approach someone and ask, “Are you a lesbian?” First and all, it is offensive, and secondly, you will not receive an answer. However, if you ask politely, she may tell you whether you’re a woman. If you’re a man, she might not be so eager. [Read: Why we all need to embrace sex positivism]

2. Believe in your instincts. If you’re a woman and another woman smiles and looks at you, she’s probably trying to find out if you like women. And you’ll have an innate sense of what’s going on at that point. If your intuition tells you she’s interested in you, you’re probably correct. This is true for any sexuality or individual. Follow your instincts.

3. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Many people will examine a girl’s nails to determine whether or not she is a lesbian. Listen, I don’t have long nails, and I’m not a lesbian. Because of sex, many lesbians now do not have long nails. However, there are other lesbians who do.

So, be cautious when employing the “short nails” sexuality test.

4. She makes a passing reference to it in conversation. Some people will try to give you hints by talking to you. Maybe she tells you about her neighborhood, which is renowned as an LGBTQ area of town, or she mentions her most recent companion, who happens to be a girl. You’ll be able to learn more about her by speaking with her.

5. Make direct eye contact. We frequently disregard minor cues such as eye contact. However, in this circumstance, eye contact is a powerful indicator of someone’s sexuality. If she is staring at you for a longer period of time than usual, she may be checking you out. The majority of our communication with others is nonverbal. You can receive the information you need from their acts before you even speak to them.

6. Her demeanor in the presence of males. When a straight woman is in the presence of an attractive man, her behavior changes, she may smile, laugh, and flirt with him more. But if she’s a lesbian, she’s not looking to attract him. She’s not going to try to impress or flirt with him. Why? She does not want to go home with him.

7. She’s had relationships with women in the past. I’m not sure what your relationship is with her, but if you both have mutual pals, I will conduct some research. If they’ve told you she’d dated women before, it could suggest she’s bisexual or a lesbian. In any case, she’s interested in women. A person’s dating history can help you figure out who they are interested in.

8. Her fashion sense. This is difficult because there are tomboy-like lesbians, femme lesbians, and some who lack a specific style. Of course, the stereotype is that lesbians have short hair and wear masculine clothing. This is how some people appear. As a result, you can use this to identify one sort of lesbian. However, lesbians should not be lumped together.

9. Where she spends her time, you don’t want to generalize again. Many straight women frequent LGBTQ-friendly bars and clubs. They enjoy the atmosphere and company while being straight. However, the ladies in an LGBTQ bar or club are more likely to be bisexual or lesbian. So, if you’re in an LGBTQ pub and a woman looks at you, odds are she’s interested in you.

10. She makes contact with you. Women, on average, are more sensitive than men. As a result, this one can be hard because straight women can hug, touch, and kiss other women without having sexual motivation. If, on the other hand, you notice she’s caressing you in more intimate places, fixing your hair, or attempting to cuddle you, there’s a good probability she’s into you.

11. She speaks about her queer experiences. Remember that just because a woman has had a sexual experience with another woman does not automatically make her a lesbian. But if she keeps bringing it up to you and talking about the experience, she could be hinting at something. What’s going on will be obvious to you.

There is no genuine way to know how to determine whether a female is gay until she tells you or you ask. If you truly desire the solution, one of those events must occur.